SanetSmit
LOVE SEES – Short read – by Sanet Smit
Sometimes it seems love is simply blind. Love sees what no eye can see. Love hears what no ear can hear. God is love. The true meaning of love would get to me when least expected.
My morning tea tastes sweet as I look through the kitchen window into the back garden. I smile because I’m happy.
Not that it was always the case. Memories of yesterday make me appreciate what I can hold on to today.
Waking up in the middle of the night to face the reality of not being pregnant anymore. Finally, after years of In Vitro Fertilisation, the only baby who made it was not there anymore.
It was a blow to our marriage. It was huge. We were both too caught up in our emotions to realize what the other must have felt.
We finally reached the point where we had driven away so far from each other that Andrew and I separated.
And to think a bad marriage hurts—it was not until we went our separate ways that we both discovered how hurtful it was. I was missing him so much.
The devil is clever. He sits in his rocking chair and smiles at you for believing everything he tells you. He gets you when you are at your lowest. And he makes you think things. Me, Sarah, strong child of God, lost the road. The one thing I thought would never happen to me. And it did.
I could do nothing more than cry. Anger and hate were locked inside of me. I couldn’t find any way to let it out. I forgot all about asking God for His help. And when I finally remembered, I forgot to ask for His forgiveness first because I had sinned.
Someone once taught me that love is all that matters. If you can get it, no one can do anything to hurt you, and if you can hold onto it, you conquer the world. I couldn’t believe it at that moment.
But God’s grace is too good to let us down. Acceptance and peace filled us both, and we found each other again at the end of that road. The thought of God giving up his only Son made it more bearable. We finally realized how our Creator must have felt more than two thousand years ago. I cried for the last time that day.
And then it happened when we least expected it. All In Vitro Fertilisation stopped. It was not going to happen again. We bought two dogs, and I found this great job. Life started to make sense again when I found myself almost three months pregnant one day. I laughed and cried happy tears for more than a week.
Jason was born a week before Christmas. We chose that name because Jason means ‘healer’. He was a gift from God to heal our wounded hearts.
‘Mommy! Mommy! Look what I’ve found!’ Jason comes running into the kitchen with one of his ‘lost’ shoes, his little three-year-old face filled with dirt.
‘Oh good! Where did you find that?’
‘Drover buried it under the leaves behind the tree again.’ He giggles as he playfully jumps on the dog.
I look at my little boy, happily playing with Rex, our other dog, who comes running into the kitchen to join in the fun. My hand goes protectively over my belly. I better get off my feet. The baby is kicking up a storm again. Soon Jason will have a little sister to play with.
Life is good.
