Dr. Rhonda Richmond
When the idea of preschool came up for my daughter, I was filled with determination and excitement. I wanted to give her opportunities I had never experienced, and I saw this as a chance to guide her into a world of learning. I set up a small, brightly colored plastic table—blue legs and yellow chairs—along with supplies from the local teacher’s store. It was a space filled with hope and the promise of new beginnings. My daughter, who was typically so compliant and eager to learn, seemed like she would embrace this moment with the same excitement I felt.
But what happened next was far from what I expected.
An Unexpected Reaction and a Lesson in Trust
As I placed the letter “A” on the paper, excited to introduce her to the world of letters, her demeanor shifted. Her bright eyes, usually so full of curiosity, clouded over with an expression I hadn’t seen before—hurt, frustration, and resistance. Before I knew it, angry words spilled out, and she hurled the pencil across the room. In that moment, I was taken aback. This wasn’t my child, the one I thought I knew so well. We engaged in what felt like a battle of wills, and it left me questioning everything.
In that moment, a verse came to mind: “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb” (Psalm 139:13). God knew my daughter long before I became her mother. He knew her heart, her mind, and her strengths. He formed her uniquely, with all her sensitivities and her potential. This wasn’t just a difficult moment—it was a part of her story and mine. God had a plan for her, even in this fiery reaction, and it was my job to trust His design and embrace her uniqueness.
Letting Go and Trusting God’s Process
As the physical and emotional intensity of that first writing session settled, I began to see this for what it truly was: a lesson in trust, patience, and grace. It wasn’t just about teaching her to write—it was about understanding who she was created to be. As much as I wanted to guide her, God reminded me that He was guiding us both. “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart” (Jeremiah 1:5).
My daughter’s reaction wasn’t defiance for the sake of it—it was a signal that I needed to adapt to who she was, as God had uniquely designed her. She wasn’t going to learn like other children, and that was okay. God had formed her perfectly for His purposes, and I had to trust in that process, even if it meant stepping back and allowing her to find her own way.
Learning as a Testimony of Growth
In this season, I also began to reflect on how the learning process isn’t just about academic growth but it’s a reflection of our spiritual journey. “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance” (James 1:2-3).
This scripture became so clear to me in the weeks and months that followed. Each time my daughter and I sat down to write, it wasn’t just about getting the letters right on paper—it was about perseverance, growth, and becoming who God intended us to be. God was using this challenging process to develop her, but He was also developing me as a mother and as a teacher. He was teaching me to be patient, to release control, and to trust His timing. Every frustration, every restart, every new attempt was shaping us both into a testimony of His faithfulness.
A New Approach: Guided by God’s Grace
As I shifted my approach, I began to see progress, not just in her writing, but in her attitude toward learning. I let go of rigid expectations and allowed God to guide me through the process. “In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps” (Proverbs 16:9). I had planned to teach her a certain way, but the Lord was establishing a different path for us—one that required flexibility, creativity, and, most of all, grace.
With each new writing session, we found our rhythm. I learned to lean on God’s wisdom rather than my own. I was reminded of how God uses the learning process to shape us, not just in terms of academics but in who we are in Christ. “For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do” (Ephesians 2:10). He had already prepared the path ahead for my daughter, and through this journey, He was also preparing me for the role He designed for me.
Introducing “But…God Gave Me A Pencil”
This experience with my daughter was a pivotal moment, not just in our learning journey but in my life as a mother and educator. It was also one of the inspirations behind my book, “But…God Gave Me A Pencil.” The book is a reflection of my own struggles with learning and how God guided me through the process, equipping me with the tools and strategies I needed, even when I didn’t realize it. Just like the pencil I held that day, God has given us all the tools to overcome our challenges.
The writing sessions with my daughter taught me that learning isn’t just about academics—it’s about growth, perseverance, and trusting in God’s plan. Each of us has our own unique path, and God equips us with the tools we need to walk it. Sometimes, all we need is a pencil, a little faith, and the trust that God is guiding every step.
The Testimony of Learning
That first writing session was just the beginning of a journey that would continue to shape both of us. God was—and still is—using the process of learning to develop us into the people He intended us to be. What started as a battle of wills turned into a story of growth, patience, and grace. Now, when I look back at that moment, I no longer see it as a failure but as the foundation of a beautiful testimony of perseverance and trust in God’s plan.
God has a way of using the unexpected and the challenging moments to build us, mold us, and refine us. As I continue to teach my daughter, I am reminded daily of the beauty in the struggle and the testimony that is being written through each step of the journey. I hold fast to this promise: “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28).
#EveryChildDeservesAChampion
#DrRhondaRichmond
#Neurodiversity
#ButGodGaveMeAPencil
